If I was being paid for the number of hours I’ve spent looking for a swimsuit the past month, I’d have enough money for a weekend getaway with my husband. (Only I wouldn’t have a swimsuit to wear once we were there.)

I just wanted you to know I’ve done my best. There are two main requirements to fulfill. I need something that fits well a body that is way different than it was eight years and two kids ago. Without making me look like I’m wearing a muumuu. And oh, there are some muumuus out there. I know, because I’ve tried them on. Second, I’ve always had a larger chest, and now that I’m still nursing a toddler a couple times a day…. Do you know how hard it is to find swimwear with a modest neckline? I was lamenting this to a couple friends, who both told me, separately, that I should just tie the straps tighter, which made me laugh and laugh because, as anyone with a higher bra size knows, those straps are just no match against the force of gravity, no matter how tight you tie them. Bless their hearts.

I’ve done my best and found a still-imperfect suit. I’m going to go to the pool and splash with my kids and bend down to hug them and eat pizza from the snack shop. I am going to TRY, going to PRACTICE, not worrying about what other people think, of my body or my cleavage. If you see me at the pool, please feel free to give me a wink and a high five if this resonates with you. We’re in this together, mamas.

PS And by “mamas” I include all women who labor for greater love and acceptance.